CLEATOR - New Joke Sputtering
On Tuesday, August 18th I once again tried my hand at working a joke that’s been brewing in my head for the last couple years. The joke is a true story of my visit to a doctor. So many things were so weird that it necessitated its own bit.
On my first attempt to share this joke, it was very, very clunky. It had no flow and it didn’t help that I missed some points to the joke. So after a start that elicited some laughter, the bit quickly descended into a long awkward bit. I’ve done some major revisions on the joke before trying it out again on Tuesday. And although I received a more positive response from the older members of the crowd, I still had some issues.
Here is a list of the issues with Cleator –
- Younger members of the crowd can’t relate to the topic
- Topic is fricken gross
- I had trouble memorizing the joke
- Some of the tags are very subtle
Even though I have a short list of issues with this joke, I still have a lot of faith in it. I think with some time and further revisions, I KNOW I can make this joke work.
Dennis L.
About Flip N Funny
- Dennis Litonjua
- Initially, this blog was designed to track my development as a comic. Although that remains true today, the blog has evolved into something more. The FlipNFunny Blog is now a catchall medium to express my thoughts on any subject whether it concerns comedy, films, sports, or life in general. Essentially, if I feel strongly about something, you can expect to see my thoughts here. Thank you.
Friday, August 21, 2009
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
YUKS - 10 vs. 10
YUKS – 10min vs 10min
August 3, 2009
On June 10, 2009, I had my best set ever at Yuks. It was part of an ethnic show where I did a SOLID 10min set. Last week, I did my first paid set at Yuks by doing the 10min spot on Tuesdays. Although I felt good about my set, it came nowhere near the first 10min spot I did which will count (for now) my best set EVER.
In preparing for the 2nd set, I made a mental note to WAIT for the laughter to die down before proceeding with the next joke. I think I made the mistake of waiting too long this time around. I have to get a better feel for the timing of the situation. I have to learn to find that spot where the crowd’s laughter is BEGINNING to die down to tell the next joke. But I also need to be very careful as to not wait too long so I don’t kill the momentum. The two experiences have illustrated this important detail for me.
June 10, 2009
Kamikaze
This
Box Set
Flip Commitment
Indian Swimming
Brown Medal
The Rabbit
Tunnel of Love
Juice
July 28, 2009
Kamikaze
This
Box Set
Flip Commitment
Indian Swimming
Porn
The Rabbit
Tunnel of Love
Juice
As you can see there isn’t much difference between the two set lists with the exception of the replacing Brown Medal with Porn. As for the pieces bits themselves, there was one minor change worthy of note in The Rabbit. Beyond that, no changes were made.
Dennis L.
August 3, 2009
On June 10, 2009, I had my best set ever at Yuks. It was part of an ethnic show where I did a SOLID 10min set. Last week, I did my first paid set at Yuks by doing the 10min spot on Tuesdays. Although I felt good about my set, it came nowhere near the first 10min spot I did which will count (for now) my best set EVER.
In preparing for the 2nd set, I made a mental note to WAIT for the laughter to die down before proceeding with the next joke. I think I made the mistake of waiting too long this time around. I have to get a better feel for the timing of the situation. I have to learn to find that spot where the crowd’s laughter is BEGINNING to die down to tell the next joke. But I also need to be very careful as to not wait too long so I don’t kill the momentum. The two experiences have illustrated this important detail for me.
June 10, 2009
Kamikaze
This
Box Set
Flip Commitment
Indian Swimming
Brown Medal
The Rabbit
Tunnel of Love
Juice
July 28, 2009
Kamikaze
This
Box Set
Flip Commitment
Indian Swimming
Porn
The Rabbit
Tunnel of Love
Juice
As you can see there isn’t much difference between the two set lists with the exception of the replacing Brown Medal with Porn. As for the pieces bits themselves, there was one minor change worthy of note in The Rabbit. Beyond that, no changes were made.
Dennis L.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)